A Change In Pace
by IAmATurtleMeow
Summary: What happens when Rin and Sesshomaru are forced to switch bodies due to a witches spell? How will they return to normal? and most importantly how will Rin deal with a sudden mass of power as Sesshomaru is reduced to none?
1. Prologue

**Author's Note: I do not own Inuyasha, and also this will be a short chapter, tell me what you think of the idea!**

Rin was walking behind Sesshomaru, she was captivated by his elegant strides, and his godlike appearance. He seemed so intelligent and overwhelmingly powerful. She looked at herself, she walked in a wobbly manner, and every so often she might trip on a tree root or rock that was deep inside the ground. Also, her appearance was dull, her hair was dirty from not bathing in two days and her kimono had a small amount of dirt on it. She had no particular skills, all she was good at was picking flowers and perhaps making them into crowns every so often. She looked up at the sky and wondered what it would be like if she was more like Sesshomaru.


	2. A Woman's Cry and Her Pink Mist

Sesshomaru, Rin, Jaken, and Ah Un were walking, the sun slowly going down causing the sky to be a beautiful pink and purple color.

"Lord Sesshomaru," Rin began

"Isn't the sky beautiful?" she had hope in her voice, although she knew that he wouldn't even spare a glance.

"Such a silly question, do you honestly think Lord Sesshomaru cares about the sky?" Jaken scolded.

"Oh, sorry My Lord" she said with a hint of dissapointment in her voice.

"Jaken, do you think it's beautiful?" she said, her usual perky tone returning.

"Foolish human, why would someone such as myself care about the sky, honestly!" he hissed.

"Master Jaken, what do you think is beautiful?" She asked, curiosity flowing in her words and questioning filling her chocolate brown eyes.

The green imp was about to speak when a woman's scream was heard in the distance.

"Lord Sesshomaru, did you hear that?, it sounds like someone is in trouble." Rin said biting her lip. The man in front of her did not slow his perfect steps, or acknowledge her.

"Who cares about some human?, the less in this world the better!" Jaken stated sourly, as if Rin had been a complete fool to even bring it up.

Rin stopped walking and looked in the direction she heard the scream from.

"Well, I'll be right back!"

there was obvious doubt in her eyes, she didn't want to leave for too long and be left behind by her Lord, but she knew in her pure heart if she didn't try to help now, she would regret it later. She ran off quickly, before she could change her mind, she heard the faint sound of Jaken's shrill voice shouting

"Get back here you foolish girl!, you had better not cause Sesshomaru any trouble or else I-" he was then cut off by Sesshomaru's deep and emotionless warning

"Jaken, let her be" he said in a commading voice

"Yes Mi'lord..." he replied, obviously disappointed to have annoyed the Great Demon.

Rin had been running for a few minutes until she found a small clearing that led out to an ocean of yellow flowers. She gasped at them, they were so beautiful, she wished to pick each and every one of them. She scanned meadow until a woman on her hands and knees caught her eye. Slick, long, black locks of hair shrouded her face, and she wore a tattered plain blue kimono. Rin cautiously walked up to her, as if not to startle her. She swallowed a lump in her throat, but that same lump seemed to move itself into the pit of her stomach.

"Ma'am," she forced out

"a-are you okay I-I thought I heard a scream coming from this direction."

Rin could feel her heart beating against her chest as she waited for this mysterious woman to answer.

Suddenly the womans face snapped up to look at Rin, causing her to jump a few steps back and her heart to flutter frantically. The woman's face was in a wicked sneer, causing Rins eyes to widen in horror. Her sneer grew, revealing razor teeth, and her orb like black eyes turned into a hideous blood red color.

"How kind of you to come to my aid" said the woman in a wicked voice, her words felt like swords against Rin's brain, she couldn't run, she felt as if she was bound to the spot she stood in. The woman took slow strides to Rin, amuesment dancing on her face.

"Darling, why do you seem so nervous?, I don't bite...," she placed a hand on Rin's cheek and chuckled darkly.

"Or do I?" she mused as she pretended to bite Rin's face, only missing it by a few inches.

The sudden movement cause Rin to jump and she was free'd from her daze. The woman started to stride towards her, like a cat stalking a mouse but before she could get too close Rin started to flee.

"**Lord Sesshomaru!**" She shouted, hoping for him to come to her aid, but he didn't. Suddenly the woman pounced on Rin causing her to fall over.

"Goodbye darling" she hissed widening her mouth.

Rin closed her eyes and waited for the razors to stab into her flesh, putting an end to her life.

As she waited, she realized it wasn't coming, she cautiously opened her eyes and saw Lord Sesshomaru standing behind the woman his Bakusaiga to her back. His eyes were a beautiful gold, but it seemed as if small flames were burning beneath them. The woman had turned her face toward him, but still remained on the Rin's body. She paused, but then began to slowly stand up and face the demon in front of her. Rin got up and ran behind Sesshomaru.

He narrowed his eyes and looked at the woman as if she held a dark secret, but it was not long before her head was rolling at his feet. He began to turn away to decend into the forest when he heard the head talk.

"I will die soon," it began in a wicked voice, an evil smile across her face

"but I will give you a parting present." Sesshomaru had turned his head slightly to see what this worthless woman was rambling on about.

Suddenly her hand twitched, and from it came a pink mist that wrapped around Rin and Sesshomaru, causing them to black out.


	3. A New Feeling

Rin fluttered her eyes open and gasped at what she saw. Everything was so vivid, no details where hidden from her eyes, the sky looked even more beautiful than it had before, and she was surprised her heart didn't stop. She felt heavy, not as if she was dieing or injured, but as if she had gained a few pounds in the time she was passed out. She knew she had more clothes on, she felt the long sleeves on her arms, and her legs where now completely covered, and she had _shoes_ on. She was about to get up when suddenly, she felt tingly, as if small bolts of energy where waltzing themselves through her veins. It didn't feel bad, it felt good, amazing even. She closed her eyes to really get a good feel of it when something hit her.

"Lord Sessho-" She began, and then suddenly stopped. She felt her eyes widen, her voice sounded so deep, so commanding, was it really her that just spoke?

She started to get up, expecting it to be difficult, but it was as easy as taking a breath of fresh air.

Once she was up she looked at her hands. The nails where long, and her hands where huge, but they where soft, and not dirty in the least. She could feel her heart pound, or was it her heart?, she didn't know what to do, she wanted to scream, but then she heard the sound of her own cough. She looked down and saw her body, it was coughing and the her eyes fluttered open. Who was in her body? She didn't have long to guess until she heard her voice

"Rin?" She heard it call out, but shortly after she saw her eyes widen and her body tensed.

"Lord Sesshomaru?" She forced out, the deep voice squeezing at her insides, she didn't like hearing herself use it. She evaluated her body, her face was cold and emotionless, her body tense, yes, that was Lord Sesshomaru...but how?

"The woman was a witch" he answered as though he had read her mind, and although his voice was that of a little girls, it still sounded cold and angry.

Rin watched as Sesshomaru got up, his eyes widened and then narrowed into a squint.

"Humans' have such terrible eye sight" he scoffed.

Rin closed her eyes and heard something, water?, that's strange, she hadn't noticed it before, and voices...but the next village was miles from here, she was getting nervous until she finally blurted out a question.

"What do we do?" and although her voice was deep, it was hopeful. Sesshomaru looked up at her

"I haven't the slightest idea" he said In a tone that would make the walking dead retreat to their graves._ My voice sounds frightening when Lord Sesshomaru uses it, I can hardly believe it's my mouth talking. _

"Rin," she heard her flat voice

"I have no powers as a human, but you do." He looked his body, which Rin now possessed up and down.

He looked different, his eyes had looked bright, and hope fluttered within them, the way he stood was nervous, self-concious maybe, he didn't like it, Rin had made him seem vulnerable, but that wasn't the main problem he was faced with.

_Rin has been given a great ammount of power, perhaps the strongest, and when a human is faced with demonic powers they cannot control it and go on killing rampages, but Rin seems perfectly fine, is it because she is in my body?_

He looked himself over again and tightened his jaw...or...Rin's jaw.

"Lord Sesshomaru..." the deep voice said nervously, he hated it.

"What?" he almost snapped, but the girlish voice he was now cursed with made it seem calmer.

"I'm scared, I mean you turn into a giant dog demon sometimes, is it possible to do that by accident? What if I do and I can't changed back?" He felt his eyes widened,

_Rin is given all of this power, and she's worried about accidentally __transforming? _It was almost comical to him.

"Perhaps, but I have never had that trouble before." He should be worried about being a small defenseless girl, but he would find a way to change back, he knew a man in the next village who might be able to help, althought it was miles away.

The something hit him,

_what if we run into danger, does Rin know how to control my powers?... no, she's afraid to transform by accident, obviously she has no idea. _

"Rin, we might run into danger, so I need to start teaching you how to use my powers." He stated. He saw his golden eyes widen.

"Lord Sesshomaru...," she began nervously like a child who had broke his mother's favorite vase

"I might have to...kill?" Sesshomaru felt pity for her, she was so innocent, so pure, but now she would have to slaughter any demon who dared to threaten them.

"Yes." He answered simply.

He felt irritated, not at Rin, but because he could not hear vast distances, or smell any near by trouble, he was completely useless.

"Now, we will start with poison claws," he began abruptly, not wanting to waste anymore time.

" Close your eyes an focus all your energy into your hands, imagine them turning a sickly green color." He repeated the words his father had told him when he was being taught how to attack, he had gotten it instantly, but as he looked up at Rin, she seemed confused.

He was about to speak when he heard a growl, he had known it, it had come from Rin often.

He was experiencing hunger.


	4. What is that smell?

Sesshomaru looked down at his small stomach. Then he heard something that he hadn't thought he ever would, his own laughter. He looked up at his body, Rin was laughing into his hand, it was deep, and it was very charming. She looked down at him

"I'm so sorry My Lord!" she apologized, he didn't answer.

"Rin...," he began reluctantly. She directed her golden eyes at him and beamed, it bothered him to see himself show such emotion, but he didn't say anything.

"I'm hungry" he stated, he saw her suppressing her giggles

. She made her face cold and emotionless, taking Sesshomaru off guard.

"You must fend for yourself" she said in the same tone and words he had said to her when she said she was hungry.

For a split second he thought he was serious until she burst into giggles.

"Sorry My Lord!, I just wanted to say that, I'll get you some fish if you'd like." She said with a smile.

"Very well" he said and began to walk into the forest, until Rin spoke up

"Where are you going?, and what do we tell Jaken?" Sesshomaru took a moment to think before answering

"I'm going to find him, and we won't tell him anything." the response shocked Rin, bringing on her next question

"Won't he notice a change in our behaivors?" "When around him, don't talk, and I won't either, just say 'Rin's throat is hurting, she won't be speaking, and don't talk to her.'" Rin bit her lower lip before nodding

"Yes My Lord" she said enthusiastically.

She pointed to her left

"Jaken is that way My Lord, I've heard him calling out 'Lord Sesshomaru' for a few minutes now, and once you get to him he'll probably question where you...I mean I am." Sesshomaru let out a small sigh and said

"I'll say you ran off and didn't tell me where you where going, then I'll tell Jaken you told him to look after me" He seemed beyond annoyed, maybe because he didn't want to deal with Jaken in Rin's body.

"Okay!" She exclaimed and smiled so brightly it could blind the Sun. It then disappeared and she asked

"How fast can I run?" tilting her head to the side, his silver strands of hair waterfalling down.

"Very." is all he said and began walking. She bit her lip and faced to her right, probably where she heard running water, and was gone in a flash.

**-Sesshomaru-**

As he walked dow the dirty path he loathed not wearing shoes more and more, as a demon he had a high pain tolerance, if a knife went through his hand it feel like a meer pinch, but now as he walked every pebble he stepped on caused small stabbing pains in his...Rin's feet. He sighed to let out the frustration, he was managing alright. He heard Jaken's calls for the lord growing closer when he felt a terrible pain course through his foot. He looked down wide eyed, he had stubbed his toe on a tree root. He tightened his jaw and took a deep breath.

_Is this what Rin has to tolerate walking barefoot?_

He looked straight ahead refusing to let his expression waver.

He came into the clearing Jaken had spotted him.

"Rin!, you foolish girl running off like that!, where is Lord Sesshomaru?" he was squinting his eyes at the girl and exerting his weight onto his staff, obviously tired from searching.

"He left without saying anything, he told you to watch me." He tried to make the girls voice sound as perky as possible, it disgusted him.

"Fine, but you had better not run off!, I don't want to get in any trouble with Lord Sesshomaru because you wanted to go pick _flowers_" he hissed the last word as if it burned his tongue just to say it.

_Is this how Jaken treats Rin when I leave?_ He narrowed his eyes,

_no wonder why she leaves. _

Sesshomaru decided to lean against Ah Un like Rin usually would and pretended to sleep to avoid unwanted conversation with Jaken.

_~Rin~_

She darted through the forest, she expected that going so fast would cause her to hit a tree,or trip, but she was elegantly gliding through without any trouble. It felt amazing, the wind on her face, how the long silver strands of hair flew behind her, she felt invincible, but then again...she was. She finally arrived at the river she had heard from the meadow and looked down at it. It was crystal clear and there were many silver, shiny fish racing down the stream. She watched them, concentrating on the ones she wanted. She kneeled down beside the river and roller the long white and red sleeves up. She didn't want to get Sesshomaru's outfit wet. She looked down into the river and was ready to take the fish, but something stopped her, the reflection in the water.

When she looked in the water, she expected to see a cold face, but what she saw was different. The face that was Sesshomaru's looked kinder, and strangley more feminine. She chuckled into her hand,

_maybe that's why Lord Sesshomaru doesn't smile, he looks like a girl._

She giggled and then focused on the fish in front of her. _This should be easier than usual...I hope. _She focused on one of the silver fish and quickly swiped it. She stared at it in her hand...it had never been this simple before. She put it beside her as it flopped and gasped trying to breathe and swiped another.

_Wow...this is amazing, I've never been able to catch so many so quickly..._ she bit her lip.

_If it's so easy to get them for Lord Sesshomaru, why does he always tell me to do it myself? _She shook the thought from her head and got two more before leaving.

She ran into the clearing where she could hear a crackling fire. It was getting dark now and she heard the sound of steady breathing. She turned her head and saw both Lord Sesshomaru and Jaken were asleep. She chuckled too herself and decided to prepare the fish for them both so when they woke up they'd have something to eat. After she was done putting the fish on sturdy wooden sticks she sat them by the fire. As they cooked she smelt something, something that she knew was trouble.


	5. the Feeling of Murder

Rin was unsure what to do, it smelt disgusting, like a rotting corpse.

_Should I wake Lord Sesshomaru?_

She bit her lip as the smell grew stronger. Whatever this thing was it was moving closer. She walked over to her body, she felt like a little child who had a bad dream, but is afraid if she wakes her mother she will be angry. Something else stopped her, she had never seen Lord Sesshomaru sleep before, even when she woke up in the middle of the night Sesshomaru would be awake, of course he would be sitting under a tree or standing in the moonlight. She moved the little girl's body slightly, that had always been enough to wake her up, if a feather landed on her, her eyes would quickly snap open. She heard herself awaken, and heard a yawn,

_My gosh...Lord Sesshomaru is so adorable!_ She chuckled and waited for Lord Sesshomaru to completely awaken.

The little girl's body flew up, her expression cold and unwavering as she took in the surroundings.

"Rin?," Sesshomaru said as he looked at her

"what is it?" Rin pointed to her right and spoke carefully, she knew how hard it was to comprehend what people were saying after she just woke up.

"I smell something disgusting, like a rotting corpse or something," she began and plugged her nose

"It's getting closer, what do you think it is?" Sesshomaru paused for a second to rub his eye and took a deep breath

"A demon." He stated and narrowed his eyes

"Rin, you are unable to fight still, we best get moving, how strong is the smell?" Rin unplugged her nose and sniffed, she could almost choke. If she where still in her body her eyes would have stung and she may have thrown up.

"It's really strong."

Sesshomaru tensed

"Rin, are you prepared to fight?" he asked, she knew that her answer would have to be yes by the tone he had spoke in.

"Yes" she said, and she felt like she was going to pass out from nerves as the smell drew closer and closer.

She could hear it now, tree's being pushed aside like mere branches and clashing to the ground. She heard a low grunt, the demon, and she felt so cold she might as well have been standing on a block of ice. She looked at Lord Sesshomaru, she didn't like how he put such a cold look on her face, her brown eyes where dull, and her lips gave no sighn of a smile. She shook it off and waited, the demon would be here any second.

**BOOM** the tree to her right was tossed aside and Jaken woke up in a fuss.

"Oh my, what hap- OH MI'LORD!" He screached. Rin didn't know what to do.

_Focus your energy into your hand, focus your energy into your hand__. _

She looked, it wasn't working, she looked up at the demon, he was a giant purple monster with red eyes and short black hair, he smelt putrid, unlike herself, and he seemed to lack intelligence. The purple beast was taller than the trees, and as it brought its fist down to crush her, she was able to move out of the way in time. She looked at Lord Sesshomaru who gazed deep inside her eyes, she nodded

_I can do this_.

The purple beast threw his fist down again, and Rin of course dodged it.

"Mi'lord what are you doing?!" Jaken shrieked in distress. Rin didn't answer, she knew Lord Sesshomaru wouldn't in this situation. Suddenly the demon directed it's attention to Lord Sesshomaru and Jaken. Rin felt her heart pound.

**_No!_**

As the demon brought it's fist down Rin swooped in and move them out of the way.

"THANK YOU MI LORD!" Jaken cryed. Rin looked up at the demon, she felt a aggravated now. She wanted him gone, out of their lives.

Sesshomaru looked up at Rin, her jaw was tight and her eyes threw daggers at the demon. She was obviously angry now, and he could tell she wanted nothing more than the demise of the demon before her. He looked down at her hand, it was glowing a tint of green.

_Good Rin. _

He cleared his throat loudly and when Rin looked back him with curious eyes he discreatly pointed to her hand. She looked down and smiled before returning her eyes to the demon.

_Okay, so it's working, my hands are glowing a bit, but how do I do this completely?_

She closed her eyes and imagined what could happen to Lord Sesshomaru and Master Jaken if she didn't attack the demon. Suddenly her hand started to tingle, it felt amazing and when she looked down it was brilliant green color. She was unsure of what to do until she heard Lord Sesshomaru whisper

"attack."

She nodded her head slightly and charged at the demon holding her hand beside her head. She thrust the glowing limb into the demons chest.

_It's as easy as going through butter..._

She pulled her hand out, it was dripping with blood, but soon it slid off of it. She smiled, she felt strange, she _liked_ killing the demon.

She felt her hand tingle again and aimed for the monsters throat. She went right through it, the demon howled in pain, but she merely chuckled to herself.

_This feels amazing!... _

_I want more._

She felt something different now, something that alarmed her, her body was tingling, and she knew it wasn't supposed to. Somehow she knew her eyes where glowing a brilliant red and her pupils where an ominous blue. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes feeling herself slowly return to normal. She pulled out her hand and it dripped, but it didn't amused her like it did a second ago. The demon held it's throat, gurgling out painful wales. Rin let the blood slide off of her hand, and as the demon fell to the ground, it's heart no longer beating, the fact that she had killed a demon and enjoyed it clawed into her heart deeper than her arm into it's throat.


	6. the Eyes of Murder

"Jaken," she damanded, she looked into his eyes in a way that would cause a shiver to run down your spine.

"Go fetch water"

"Yes Mi'Lord!," he squealed

"Uh, but from where?" he questioned nervously

"Go." she commanded, releasing most of her frustration in that one word. Jaken's eyes widened and he broke into a cold sweat

"Y-yes Mi'Lord" he stuttered before running off into the forest, she heard him trip, but he immediately got up and scurried down a path where he had hoped water was.

Rin waited until she assumed he was far enough away so she could let her emotionless mask slip and allow pain to replace it. She fell to her knee's and put one hand over her face.

"I can't believe what I did," she began, trying to keep in the tears that stung her eyes

"why...?" she asked herself. Sesshomaru stared at her, wide-eyed.

"Rin," he began

"you let your emotions control you, you must learn to have more control" she looked up at him, pain in every inch of her eyes.

"What?" she questioned, but her voice was weak.

"When you got frustrated it helped you gain control of your power, but after the first strike you let the power control you, you gave into it because your emotions where overunning your mind." She blinked and looked up at the sky, she wished it could tell her the way out of this mess.

"Sesshomaru, I had fun killing that demon, but now that it's done, I feel like _I_ should be the one to die," She looked down at the ground letting silver strands hide her face.

"I have never hated myself this much since...," she closed her eyes tightly, as if trying to hide her thoughts from the memory

"since I sat there and watched my parents die." Sesshomaru stood there, silent, until he found something to say "Rin, you can cry" he assured her and with those words hot streams poured from Sesshomaru's golden eyes. He went up to her

"Rin, you are not a bad person, the strong powers that you have been given are hard to control when emotions over come you." the way Sesshomaru said the words wasn't cold like they usually were, they had a slight hint of pity.

"How will we ever change back?" she said in between a sob, Sesshomaru tried to make his voice reassuring, but he sounded as if he had something lodged in his throat

"I know a man in the next village, he will tell us how." Rin looked at Sesshomaru and gave a faint smile

"Thank you My Lord."

he said nothing, just looked out into the forest. Rin sighed and got up patting the small stains of dirt off of her lord's kimono. She felt a tinge of guilt for commanding Jaken so harshly, but she needed to be alone with Lord Sesshomaru, just for a little while. He seemed in deep thought, as if he had shut the world out. She sighed gliding to a nearby tree and sat down letting the firm trunk support her. Although she wasn't tired she closed her eyes to rest, she wanted to escape the world for awhile.

Sesshomaru payed no mind to her, or anything for that matter. He was deep in thought, replaying the events that had just occurred a few minutes ago. Rin had been normal the first time she had gained control of the poison claw and elegantly flew through the air and struck the demon in the chest. He had been impressed, she had done it almost perfectly, but then he sensed something. He had seen a faint pink mist cloak around her, it was hardly noticeable with his human eyes, but he saw it. Rin took her hand out of the demons chest, and the thick red flowed off of her razor sharp hands. All of the sudden her hand started to glow again, fiercly. She lunged for his throat, she contiusly pushed into his throat until her arm was elbow deep into the putrid purple flesh. The pink mist was thicker now, easily noticeable, although when he faced Jaken, he seemed oblivious to it.

He had moved slightly to catch a glimpse of her face. As it came into view he felt his eyes widen, her smile was wicked, she enjoyed the feeling of the demons life slipping away at her will. Her eyes started to turn as red as the blood coming from the demons wounds and her pupils at narrowed into a deep blue.

_Rin is losing control of her humane soul, she's letting her emotions get the better of her, and if she does that the demon inside will cause her to go on a killing rampage, and eventually destroy her soul._

Before he could seriously start to worry the smile dropped. Instead a self-loathing and pain streaken mask replaced it. She closed her eyes tightly, fighting the demon inside, and suddenly the pink had thinned until it was gone and when she had opened her eyes, they were a beautiful gold, tinted with sadness and despair.

He snapped out of the memory and gave a sigh.

_Rin, if you give into your emotions again you could destroy everything along you with yourself._

A flash of her smiled flew through his mind, and the memory of when she had been in the flower field.

_She laughed gently as she ran through a sea of pink and blue flowers, she seemed so free, as free as the wind itself. She kneeled down to the flowers and began picking them, he could tell by simply watching her from a shady tree, her heart was content. He closed his eyes to enjoy the peace, and he could smell that she was nearing him with flowers in her hands. _

_"Lord Sesshomaru?" she said a bit louder than normal to get his attention. He opened one eye and she beamed. _

_"Yes Rin?" he'd asked emotionlessly. She looked down at her hands, obviously battling with her thoughts until she shyly held up the flowers she had picked and gave a faint, unsure smile. _

_"I picked these for you." He had just closed his eye and blocked her out. He heard a sound of dissapointment from inside her throat, as her steps grew further away into the flowers. _

_'Thank you' he had thought to himself._

The sound of pain had awoken him out of his daze and he turned his head to Rin, she was in a sweat and seemed to be in pain, perhaps it was a nightmare? She squirmed around restlessly until finally she opened her eyes, except they weren't a beautiful gold anymore...

They were blood red, with deep blue pupils and the desire to kill.


	7. Driven by Pain

Rin had opened her eyes, but she felt different, her sight was no longer vivid, and she could not hear anything but her shallow breathing. She lifted up her hands to see they were once again small, her heart started to beat rapidly,

_am I back to normal? _

She reached for her hair, and looked at it.

_My hair is black...I'm myself again!_

She started to giggle excidetly, when she noticed Sesshomaru was no where to be found.

"Lord Sesshomaru?" she asked nervously, the forest was beginning to grow darker, and soon she would not even be able to see the trees in front of her.

"Master Jaken?" she spoke in a hushed tone, it seemed so cold here, something had changed...where was she?

"Lord Sesshomaru has abandoned you Rin..." A familiar wicked voice taunted.

"W-who are you?" Rin asked, she felt her heart beat against her ribs, any harder and they would break.

"Do you not remember?" the voice hissed, obviously the woman speaking was enraged, then it hit her.

"You're that lady Lord Sesshomaru killed!, the one who tried to...who tried to eat me!" She felt her eyes widen,

_where is Lord Sesshomaru and Master Jaken?_

"They've abandoned you, silly insolent girl" she stated with a wicked laughter that sent a chill up Rin's spine.

_Can she read my mind?...and they... abadoned me?, what did I do wrong__?_

Rin felt warm tears go down her cheeks.

"Yes darling, I can, and yes they did, you did nothing wrong my poor dear," the woman said, her voice still sounded vicious, but sympathetic

"Lord Sesshomaru has merely grown tired of you."

_He grew...tired of me?_

Rin felt her heart break into one million pieces, she was surprised the shatter didn't make any noise.

"Dearest Rin," the voice began

"We can get back at him, we can get...revenge" She snickered evily, and with those words Rin felt her stomach drop.

"No!, I would never hurt Lord Sesshomaru!" She stated, but the tears continued down her cheeks like a never-ending waterfall. She felt so hurt, and she didn't know what to do with herself, but she would not betray her Lord, ever.

"Darling, why not?, he hurt you...I can read your mind and you aren't doing a good job at hiding your thoughts," before Rin could object the woman continued,

"You won't have to do anything, just relax your body, and let me do the work"

Rin was about to argue with her, but she felt her body slowly relax, she tried to struggle against it, but the pain she felt made it too hard to try.

She felt her eyes open, and in front of her was Lord Sesshomaru, his beautiful white hair cascaded down his back, his golden eyes shimmered in the light, his beautiful purple moon and magenta striped cheeks made him seem as god like as ever. She felt her heart ache, and she got up from the tree she was resting under. Sesshomaru's eyes widened as he backed away. She couldn't think, and before she knew it she felt her hand tingling. She walked closer and closer to him.

"Rin?" he asked, she saw a hint of worry in his eyes, it made her pause.

_Is Sesshomaru worried about me?_

Before she could think about it she heard a wicked voice

"_No darling, he is worried for himself, he doesn't care about you." _The words the woman said stabbed the already broken pieces of her heart and she began to walk towards Sesshomaru. She raised her hand, ready to strike, when he spoke again.

"Rin, snap out of it" he commanded.

_Snap out of what?_

She felt her hand tingle wildly. Before she could strike Sesshomaru stepped forward and grabbed her by the shoulders.

"Rin, snap out of it, if you do this it'll only be a matter of time before you lead yourself to your own end"

_Lord Sesshomaru...are you trying to help me? _

She wondered to herself silently.

"No!, he cares nothing about you, **kill him.**" the wicked voice commanded.

Rin looked at Sesshomaru, and saw worry in his eyes, not for himself, but for her. She felt herself loudly call out "Lord Sesshomaru!" and her hand stopped tingling.

_I do not care if he **did **abandon me. He is the one who brought me back to life **twice** he has done more than enough for me, I will never hurt him, not even if he kills me._

Suddenly she collapsed on the ground. The voice was gone, and she was in total control of her body. Then she realized something, her vision was still as vivid as it had been when she switched bodies with Sesshomaru. She looked at her hands, they were still huge and her nails where long and as razor sharp as they could be. She looked up at Lord Sesshomaru who was still in her body.

_What happened?_

"Lord Sesshomaru?" she asked, but she felt terribly weak,

"what happened?"

he kneeled down beside her, his eyes where not cold and flat like she expected, they where worried.

"Rin, what did you dream about?" she felt hot tears sting her eyes,

"I had a dream I was back in my body, and you had left me because I was boring you." she sniffled as her tears dripped down onto the try dirt causing small spots.

Sesshomaru's eyes widened

_that's what caused this?_

He shook his head slightly

"Rin, I would not leave you behind, and you do not _bore _me, I have kept Jaken around for years, if he is not gone, how would you ever expect yourself to be?" Rin's eyes widened as she looked up at him, she felt her heart pound and more tears fall.

"Thank you Lord Sesshomaru!, but...," she sniffed

"do you hate me for trying to attack you?..., are you mad?"

"Not in the least, you were driven by emotion, you did not understand your actions, your pain acted for you, I could never be mad about that, don't cry anymore." Rin wiped her tears and looked up

"Thank you Lord Sesshomaru" she said once more and he nodded slightly and got up.

"I never did eat" he stated looking up at the sky. Rin looked at the fire, it remained crackling, and the fish were starting to burn. She quickly ran to take them away to the fire and held one out to Lord Sesshomaru,

"you better eat little girl," she said with a giggle

"wouldn't want you to get sick." She beamed while Sesshomaru went to go sit by the fire, she didn't eat anything, she didn't need human food while in her Lord's body.

While Sesshomaru silently ate she looked up at the now dark sky. She didn't feel any sorrow anymore, she was just happy to be with him, if he was in his own body or hers, she closed her eyes and smiled, waiting for Jaken's return.


	8. Screams and the Smell of Blood

Jaken finally returned when it was dark, he had a bucket of water.

"Here you are Mi'Lord" he said handing it to Rin.

She didn't want to raise suspision by thanking him, so she slightly nodded and took the water. Sesshomaru was by the fire, looking up at the sky. There were still 2 fish left on sticks for Jaken. Jaken waltzed over to Sesshomaru and ate one of the fish.

"Rin, did you make these?" he questioned in his usual high pitched voice. Sesshomaru looked at him

"Yes." he lied, but then again he had to, Sesshomaru would never make fish for them.

"Well it's burnt!, don't you know how to do this after all those years!, honestly." he hissed.

Rin looked at Sesshomaru, his eyes had darkened by a few shades, he was obviously aggravated by Jaken's disrespect. His hands were clenched into small fists, as if he was about to use Jaken's head as a punching bag. Rin had thought Jaken was done with his tirade, but he continued

"also,why did I get that water? Aren't you even going to drink any?, honestly, it was hard to get you selfish br-"

"Jaken" Rin said in a stern voice, and shot daggers with her eyes at him.

"Y-yes Mi'Lord?"

"Let her be" she hissed. She didn't like being so rude to him, but it was the only way to keep him from causing Sesshomaru to rip off his limbs,

"yes Mi'Lord" Jaken reluctantly agreed. Rin looked at Sesshomaru's face, if he clenched his jaw any tighter it would snap right off.

Suddenly a memory floated into Rin's head and she spoke

"Jaken, Rin's throat hurts, do not speak to her, she will not reply anyhow" she commanded.

"Yes Mi'Lord!" he answered almost instantly.

It was getting dark, but she did not feel tired, and she didn't want to suffer from another nightmare. She sighed and looked up at the now visible stars.

_They're so beautiful, I'm so glad I can see them so much clearer now, I wonder if Sesshomaru secretly likes to watch them while me and Master Jaken sleep._

She looked over at the bucket of water Jaken had retrieved at her command.

_What do I need this for?, it was just to distract him. I'm sure Lord Sesshomaru will become thirsty in our travels, but I can't just carry a giant bucket of water with me everywhere. _She bit her lip and then closed her eyes _I'll deal with that tomorrow._

She opened her eyes and looked toward Sesshomaru who was laying on the back of Ah-Un with his eyes closed. She could tell he was awake for his breathing was not deep and steady.

**~Sesshomaru~**

Sesshomaru closed his eyes and reflected on what had happened.

_"I had a dream I was back in my body, and you had left me because I was boring you." she had said, and she was crying enough to fill a river, but the tears did not shock him, the words behind the tears did._

_'Why would she dream about something so ridiculous?, does she truly fear being left behind, she is aloud to follow me by choice, I will not tell her to stop following me, nor will I tell her to.'_

_ he felt him shake his head ever so slightly at such a ridiculous dream._

_ "Rin, I would not leave you behind, and you do not bore me, I have kept Jaken around for years, if he is not gone, how would you ever expect yourself to be?"__I had tried to make his words sound by sincere, but whenever I tried it felt as thought a lump was in my throat._

_ "Thank you Lord Sesshomaru!, but...," she sniffed_

_ "do you hate me for trying to attack you?..., are you mad?" _

_He felt shocked at her words, but he kept his face from wavering._

_ "Not in the least, you were driven by emotion, you did not understand your actions, your pain acted for you, I could never be mad about that, don't cry anymore."_

_ he had felt a strange feeling, pity?, perhaps, but he felt something more. Although he would never admit it directly, it pained him to see her so conflicted and in so much emotional distress. He had never felt this way towards anyone let alone a __**human**__, he even found himself taking part of the blame for what was happening and often trailed into thoughts such as..._

_'perhaps if I had gone with her to investigate the woman's scream, or commanded she let it go, this wouldn't have happened' _

_but he often shook the thought away saying it couldn't be helped._

He opened his eyes and looked up at the stars. He didn't care for them, and now that his vision was dulled he could hardly see anything spectacular about them. He squinted his eyes and allowed his mind to wonder.

_How is it that Rin can always comment about how 'magical the stars look' and yet hardly even see them?, and me, a demon with vision one hundred times stronger than hers can only see useless specks in the sky? _

He directed his eyes towards Rin, he saw her eyes on him, but they quickly snapped to the fire once she realized he had noticed, all of the sudden her face changed, and she seemed to be concentrating on something, she narrowed her eyes and started to chew at her lower lip arched his eyebrow slightly. _W__hat could she be thinking about?_

He directed his attention back to the stars and let his curiosity drop as quickly as it had occurred. Then he heard a frigthened gasp come from beside him. He looked over at Rin and saw her golden eyes wide and panicked as she slowly place a claw on her mouth. He swiftly darted his eyes around, but couldn't see any nearby trouble, but it wasn't as if he could detect it with such terrible vision.

He looked back at her and narrowed his eyes, something about her terrifed expression made him feel uneasy.

"Lord Sesshomaru..." she began in a soft voice as she continued to glared at the fire, expression unwavering, it sounded as if she was detached from this world.

"I hear it...and I smell it..."

She began, her panic became more intense, her eyes growing wider, she looked deeply disturbed.

"I hear screams from the nearby village,... I smell blood...so...so much blood."

She looked up at him, and the look in her eyes was as frightened as it would be if his head was being cut off before her eyes. The next words she spoke sparked a bit of shock in him,

"They are being attacked by bandits..."


	9. Wrong from the Start

_~Rin~_

Rin was watching Sesshomaru, staring at the stars,

_I wonder what he's thinking about, he doesn't talk much, so he must think a lot. _

While she was wondering she realized he dircted his emotionless eyes at her, alarmed she quickly darted her eyes towards the fire.

_Oh gosh, I wonder if my face is turning red...I don't think so, erg, I hope he didn't notice I was staring at him...but I know he did..._

suddenly a sound that broke through her thoughts like a boulder through a glass window.

"**Everyone!, get down and hide your children, there are heavily armed bandits!, hide in your h-" **

suddenly his loud shouts were cut off. Her heart rate picked up, and soon after his silence the smell of copper and salt faintly drifted into her nose, it was blood. The smell would have made her cringe her nose, but she was too shocked to move. Her eyes grew wide, and she started to viciously bite her lower lip and her heart beat like an out of tuned drum.

She heard screams of terrified people, people with families, people who have lives, people who deserved to live, People who would never wake up again. She was able to make out only a few words of the screaming victims

"Please...not my children!, take me instead!"

a woman pleaded in between sobs, she could hear the womans heart breaking with every word she uddered. More and more blood filled her nose, but she knew it was only the beginning of the bandits slaughter. Her eyes grew even wider and they felt as if they would rip off of her face. The scent of blood was so strong she wanted to rip her nose off of her body and throw it into the fire, it was madening, the screams of innocent people and the scent of the blood everywhere was tearing at her heart, and scratching at her head to a point of insanity. She didn't know what to do, she wanted to make it stop, she wanted to stop reliving what had happened to her, she wanted to stop thinking about her dead family, and how she would never see their faces smiling again. Now it had become too much to bare, she wanted to scream, she wanted to cry, she wanted to shut the world out, for once in her travels with Lord Sesshomaru she had felt depressed and udderly alone.

"Lord Sesshomaru..." She forcefully croaked out, "I hear it...and I smell it..." she took slow shallow breathes trying to stop herself from breaking down.

"I hear screams from the nearby village,... I smell blood...so...so much blood." she snapped her head up to look at her Lord and the next words she forced out had felt like a hot blade sawing through her throat.

"They are being attacked by bandits..."

She wanted him to help her, to comfort her, for once she really, _really _needed him. She would gladly be kidnapped by Naraku again, or fall off a cliff to her death, or even be mauled by wolves, as long as he would just help her this one time, she would never call out his name in distress again. He narrowed his eyes and spoke as emotionless as ever, except this time, it dug a knife in Rin's heart

"it's none of our concern" he responded cooly, and diverted his attention back to the stars.

She felt her heart explode inside of her, her mouth fell open into a small o and she stared at him, as baffled as she had ever been in her short life.

_He didn't help me..._

she thought,

_I am alone...so what do I...what do I do now?_

She heard herself give out a small wail of pain causing Sesshomaru to slightly turn his eyes at her,

Suddenly she felt something run through her, her veins pulsed, her body tingled, and determination to stop the bandits filled her body. She got up and looked at the Lord she had once believed in she let all of her hurt and anger spill into her words, completely unafraid of what her precious _Lord_ would think.

"No. It does not concern _you_, nothing concerns _you_, as long as _you're_ not the one being put through pain!"

the harshness in her words shocked Sesshomaru, he looked at her wide eyed, but she continued anyway

"They are dieing, they are losing the ones they love! How dare you say it's not our concern!, I have always believed in you Lord, I had always seen the kind in you!, remember when the monks tried to take me away?, well I stayed with you! A demon!, I had no shame in doing so because I thought you were different then all of the other demons, I thought you were different from the bandits who killed my family!, but if you just sit here and watch the stars when you know people who are alive are suffering and being killed, then you know what? You are just as bad as the bandits!, and you might think because they're human they're worthless, but look at yourself, you're a human!, so guess what? Looks like you're just as worthless as them!"

She shouted the last words. She looked at the forest where she heard the screams, ignoring Sesshomaru's baffled stare.

"Now, I'm going to go _help_ them, I won't let people suffer, I am not like you, I don't care if I am in your body, we are nothing, and I mean _nothing_ alike, good bye Lord."

She ran out into the opening where she heard the distressed screams, she felt like her heart was being ripped apart, but she would not let that divert her attention from the village. She sighed and looked ahead as he scent of blood strengthend and the screamed nearly caused her ears to detach from her head.

_He would have just left it this way, _she thought with a sigh,

_Lord Sesshomaru...maybe I was wrong about you from the start, I should have never followed you... _


	10. the Raspy Voice

As Rin arrived at the village the scene before her caused her to freeze with horror. There where bodies tossed around like they were trash, like they were nothing. As she observed the corpses she realized many of hem died with broken necks, multiple stab wounds, twisted limbs, and even the infants suffered cruel fates. She felt her heart being ripped out for the hundreth time this day. She slowly let her eyes drift and realized all the blood that painted the huts and tainted the brown soil. Rin tried to breathe, but every breath came out with a shutter. She closed her eyes, praying for all of it to be gone, praying she was in a twisted and sick dream, but when she opened them, the horrific scene was still there, killing her from the inside out.

She then had a flash back of the day her parents and brother died.

_"Honey!, there are bandits, hide the children!" she hear her mother command, but Rin could tell her confidence was shaken. _

_They heard a loud pound on the door._

_ "Rin, you and your brother go hide!" her father hissed at her._

_ She was in shock, her heart felt like ice on her chest, she didn't know what would happen, she couldn't move. She thought she would stand there forever but then felt her older brother pick her up in his strong arms and run into the next room as the door was broken down and a raspy voice pinned itself in her mind for the rest of her life. _

_"Hey there lovely lady, aw damn, you're married aint cha?, such a dissapointment," she heard the man chuckle and clinged to her older brothers clothes. _

_"Leave us at once!" her mother screamed at him, but the bandit ignored. _

_Rin listened carefully from behind the cabinet where they were hiding, and when she looked up at her brothers face he looked angry and scared, it was as if he wasn't trying to breathe. She felt her heart pound, almost breaking he ribs, her brother __**never**__ got scared._

"_Well, since I can't have your darling wife," he snickered bitterly, at who she guessed was her father _

_"I guess imma have ta take your __**lives**__." He stated and started to laugh evily, she felt herself cringe, she wanted to scream, wanted to get away from the world, wanted it all to stop_

_. Suddenly her brother placed her down and got up, before she could ask he looked down at her, flames burning in his eyes, all fear gone, he didn't talk much, but she could always tell how he felt by looking at his eyes, and right now, they reaked of hatred and determination. _

_"I'm going to kill that bandit, before he kills our parents, stay here Rin." He commanded emotionlessly, as if nothing was happening. She felt tears sting her eyes _

_"Brother please sta-" _

_"No." he replied coldy, and ran into the next room._

_ "What are you doing out here? Do you have a death wish? We told you to hide!" she heard her mother scream in both anger and fear._

_ "Dammit son!, this is not a battle we can win!" She heard her father boom. _

_"Do not feel bad, it is best to have the whole family here, die together." Suddenly she heard her mother scream in agony, followed by her father. _

_"Now brat, time for you." He snickered._

"_No." Her brother said cooly, she heard rattling and then the raspy voice screetched _

_"Aw damn, you dumb ass brat!, I'll kill yah for that."_

_ "Hn." he replied. Suddenly she heard a gasp, a deep gasp...her brother. _

_"That'll teach yah to cut my face wih a knife, you lowly brat." The bandit hissed, obviously pleased with himself. _

_He began to walk around the house, foot steps booming toward the cabinet. Rin tried not to breathe as he took things. As he finished gathering items he found of value, he left. She slowly got up, nervous that the bandit would sunddenly come back in murder her too. As she walked to the front room she braced herself, as she slowly peeked from behind the wall she fealt her heart explode and fell to her knee's. Her mother's kneck was twisted around like an owl, her father's kneck had been stabbed in the side, and her brother...he stabbed through the chest, and bleeding onto the floor. Rin ran over to him and fell down, crying on the lifeless corpse, wetting his shoulder lengh black hair with tears. _

_"Brother!" she screamed out, not caring if the bandits heard or not, perhaps she wanted to die._

_She loved her brother so much, she loved him more than her mother and father, he would always go with her to pick flowers, he would always save her from danger if someone would try to hurt her, and he always would put her before himself. Now that he was gone, she didn't want to breathe, didn't want to speak, she just wanted to die. She got up and picked up the blade she assume her brother had used to stab the bandit and held it to her throat._

_ 'I don't want to live anymore, I want to be with my family...'_

_ but right before she stabbed the blade through her throat, she dropped it._

_ 'I didn't help them, I could have, but I was paralyzed by fear, I chose my life before theirs,'_

_ she reluctantly looked down at her brother's lifeless eyes. _

_'He wouldn't have done that...he put me before himself, I'll live, living is more painful, I deserve pain, I deserve to be in pain for the rest of my life.' she thought to herself bitterly._

_She then walked out of the home, never to speak again, never to be happy again, only to loathe herself, and live in udder despair._

She snapped out of the flash back and looked around the village, the bandits where gone...she was too late once again. Before she could fall to her knees and cry in pain she heard it...the voice that ruined her life.

The raspy voice.


	11. Time for a Little Fun

**Author's Note: Sorry for some letters missing, my computer keyboard is breaking.**

**-Sesshomaru-**

He was still in shock, staring at the spot Rin had once stood in. Her words clung to his brain like vines wrapped around a tree. He had said the villagers in distress were none of their concern, and as soon as he said them, a strange pinge of regret struck his cold heart as he saw the udder pain and distress in Rin's golden eyes. He turned his attention back to the stars, but a wail of pain escaped Rin's throat, he turned his head, and before he could say something else he noticed her eyes change, they were determined, with anger sizzling in the back of them. Suddenly she spoke

_"No. It does not concern __**you**__, nothing concerns __**you**__, as long as __**you're**__ not the one being put through pain!" he felt his eyes widen, he could hear nothing but anger and hurt in her voice._

_ "They are dieing, they are losing the ones they love! How dare you say it's not our concern!, I have always believed in you Lord, I had always seen the kind in you!, remember when the monks tried to take me away?, well I stayed with you! A demon!, I had no shame in doing so because I thought you were different then all of the other demons, I thought you were different from the bandits who killed my family!, but if you just sit here and watch the stars when you know people who are alive are suffering and being killed, then you know what? You are just as bad as the bandits!, and you might think because they're human they're worthless, but look at yourself, you're a human!, so guess what? Looks like you're just as worthless as them!"_

_ as she shouted the last words it was as if his heart stopped. He couldn't believe someone had said that to him, especially __**Rin.**__ He continued to stare at her, baffled._

_"Now, I'm going to go help them, I won't let people suffer, I am not like you, I don't care if I am in your body, we are nothing, and I mean nothing alike, good bye Lord." she stated bitterly, but before Sesshomaru had a chance to reply, she was gone._

He narrowed his eyes, looking into the fire.

_Rin, I said it was none of our concern for a reason._

He clenched his jaw in frustration,

_I didn't want you to have to relive what had happened to you, or what happened to your family__._

He closed his eyes and took a breath, he hated feeling weak and helpless, and the fact that Rin had pointed it out made him truly realise how useless he really was. He shook the thought from his head and sat up staight on Ah Un.

"Ah Un, wake up" he commanded, Ah gave a groan, as Un's eyes reluctantly fluttered open.

"We must go, and go quickly, follow the scent of blood" he told them in a stern voice, with one last groan from both heads, they took off.

_ Even as a human, it seems I'm always trying to save you from something Rin,_

he thought to himself closing his eyes,

_but I never thought I would have to save you from yourself._

_~Rin~_

When she heard the voice, her entire body froze, it was as if instead of blood her heart was beating out shards of ice.

"So, how much loot did yah get?" she heard the man croak.

"Eh, not as much as I had hoped, we done picked a poor village Boss, seems none of em' had nothin'" a deep voice replied glumly.

"Well, all the other bandits left, we should get goin' too, get on yah horse and go, I'll catch up, I just wanna check this place out a bit more" the raspy voice said, she heard the man give a sound of agreement and a horse galloping into the forest.

Then she saw him, the bandit that made her life crumble, made her want to end her own life, caused her pain.

_"Darling, why not kill him?" _she heard a voice in the back of her mind say, it sounde old and bitter, she knew that voice.

_"Let me take over, just relax, we had done this before, it's easy, trust me darling,... trust me."_

The words were so familiar, and so luring, something screamed at Rin to not trust her, but she felt herself relax, her body tingled, and she had an urge to slaughter. She felt herself walk towards the man, he would die, just like her brother.

"Hey, who is you? You gotta death wish or somethin?, get lost, or take a dirt nap." He growled at her.

She continued to move forward, a new kind of anger filled her, she had been mad before, but this time she felt different, it was stronger, it was darker. She was for once feeling hatred towards someone.

"No?, then fine!, die!" He pulled out a knife and charged toward Rin.

Blood flew into the air and splattered on Rins face, she heard the man infront of her wail in pain. She smiled,

"Does it hurt?, does it hurt to have something lodged in your chest?," Rin hissed bitterly, and when he didn't answer she grew irritated

"Well does it!?, it hurt my brother, but you killed him anyway!, now I'll kill you, slower, and you can rot in hell!" she screamed throwing his body down, she had lodged her hand into his chest before he could even think to stab her.

"Now, time for a little fun" she said evily, but her voice was different, it was her own, but there was a old bitter voice that echoed with every word she said.


End file.
